The office was bathed in morning sunlight and a miasma of ground coffee.

“You look tired.”

“So do you,” Sao said. It was the truth.

“Hell yes, I’m tired. Sick and tired of this number crunching. Twenty pages of stats to cross-check for a case that I’ve been putting off to look into Bell.” Rai spoke over the customary battering of his keyboard, clicking the mouse loudly every other minute for embellishment. “Not that I was itching to get back to this scrapheap...”

Without such a productive excuse for his exhaustion, Sao let the subject slide and opened his laptop. A number of pending transcripts were waiting in his inbox.

The day proceeded without a hitch, except for the nap Sao pulled together after lunch.

It was a steady, dreamless sleep. Riding on the clatter of Rai’s keys and the whir of the air conditioning, under the watchful glare of his laptop, Sao felt he could not fully drift off, but far as he was concerned, that was more than fine. There was something calming about being able to close his eyes while remaining aware of his surroundings. Time had been flying - it had already been a week since Delta walked through the door - and then there was the sleepwalking. He'd lost footing in time, space and self. Perhaps he should be terrified, but his brain was lacking the energy for it. With regard to sleepwalking at least, the office was a perfect place to rest. Rai was lenient, but he’d surely put a stop to any attempts to take down the front door with eyes closed. At that thought, Sao dropped out of consciousness.

Time surged around him. In what felt like less than a second later, he heard the phone ring, and snapped awake.

He realized he had hopped to his feet. Rai was staring at him from behind the monitors. “Hello? Yeah?” A sardonic pause. “What are we, Bell security?”

Sao rubbed his eyes.

“No, we haven’t been in contact with him.” Rai’s burning red gaze waited until Sao had settled back into this seat again before calling out. “Sao, did you hear anything from Delta or Sigma, or any Bell resident in the last day or so?”

“No. Is there a problem?”

“You tell him,” Rai said to the phone. He walked to Sao’s desk and tapped on the speaker.

“Afternoon, both of you.” Despite the layer of static, the voice was unmistakably Charmion’s. “Hope I’m not bothering but I thought you might know something, since, ya know, you two had a chance to get close to Bell recently.” Her sweet drawl trailed, dancing around some important point. “So… just to be sure, when’s the last you heard from them?”

“I called Bell Lodge to check on Ms. Indigo on Sunday,” Sao said. “But I haven’t seen or heard from Sigma, or Delta or Kiria, since the dinner last week.”

“The details should have gone in with the report I made on Raph,” Rai said.

“I see. So you haven’t heard the update. We have someone writing up the report now, so you’ll probably get an alert in an hour or so...” Charmion sighed. “Sigma’s missing.”

Rai paused. “No, we didn’t hear about this.”

“Missing? Have you checked with his therapist?” Sao sat up straight. His spine felt like tissue paper. “Unfortunately, we didn’t get the details for the center or clinic he was seeing, but…”

“His wife… partner? She gave us the info for the counseling office when she called. The receptionist said he came in for an appointment this morning, and left before lunch. That was normal.” Charmion paused, then muttered quietly. “The reason I ask you two is because you guys visited Judgment 225 yesterday, right? That was the last place he was seen before he disappeared. Apparently he dropped by unannounced and there was a big screaming argument with Mr. and Mrs. Joy. His old foster mom and dad. He stormed out around two P.M., and didn’t go home.”

Sao raised his head. “Are they alright? The children that live with them, are they-”

“They were fine. Nobody was hurt, Sigma didn’t get physical or any such trouble.” The speaker crackled with a second voice, papers, a keyboard clacking. Charmion was multi-tasking. “He messed around with some belongings, but no major complaint from the foster parents themselves. The Joys were more concerned for Sigma’s state than their own, if they were really concerned at all. Their complaints were so sparse that the call was brushed off, not to mention there are ten or so Sigmas in the neighborhood and they didn’t think to emphasize that the one who dropped by was the actor-turned-spiritual leader. Nobody thought to take it seriously until Ms. Kiria called the police a little after noon.”

“What did Sigma talk about? With the Joys?”

“No specifics in their report.” Some clicking from Charmion, no doubt behind her desk at HQ. “When we called back they were really concerned that he was missing, though.”

“Like hell.” Rai signed off, and before Charmion had so much as uttered goodbye, he was up with his keys.

---

“Where to?” Sao asked, tugging the door shut.

Rai looked at him as if he had spontaneously teleported into the passenger seat. “To look for Sigma. You don’t look so great, maybe you should stay at the office.”

“And wallow in not knowing?” Sao smiled. He suspected it was insubstantial, and Rai’s cutting glare only confirmed it. “Where could Sigma have gone?”

“If it were easy figure out, no doubt Kiria or Delta would have told the cops first.” The car pulled off the sidewalk. “The Joys probably know something.”

“Their children weren’t there when I visited, but you saw a bit of them. Something about their treatment must have really struck you.”

“Perceptive. But no, I’m not thinking of the kids. I just think it would be good to check out the last place Sigma was seen.”

The neighborhood shuttled by as they pulled further away from the office. Warm weather was coming, the sun was as high as it had been before Sao’s nap. Eyeing the mirror, he rubbed a patch of his face back into place. “Bell Lodge is closer to here than Judgment street.”

“Sigma’s not at Bell.”

“The police are probably canvassing Judgment Street right now for the very reason you gave. But assume Sigma left Judgment and headed home to...”

There was a flicker Rai’s eye and a neck-snapping jerk of the steering wheel. “So he might have stopped somewhere in between the two. We’ll backtrack.”

“Yes, that’s the thought.”

“That’s not bad. Alright, let’s start at Bell.”

The buildings around them swirled as Rai turned the car around. Sao pulled out his phone, inspected his reflection in the smooth blackness of the screen. He did look a bit rougher than he’d have liked - or maybe his vanity had just been inflated after Rai’s approval toward his little plan.

He tapped the phone awake and keyed up a short message to Delta.

Cursory greetings. How are you doing? Look, we got a call this morning, and I wanted to make sure you’re okay. No pressure, but if you can recall…

All of a sudden there was a weight on his throat. The pocket of air around him was closing in - no, it was just the smell that was smothering. Lurching upright, he found they were already driving up to the shambled district that surrounded Bell Lodge. Petals filled the air like butterflies. He looked down at his phone. The message had barely proceeded past the third line. Hitting the send button at last, Sao rubbed his head and lowered it against the dashboard.

Rai’s eyes slid his way. “What is it?”

“You were right.”

“About?”

“There really aren’t enough hours in a day.”

Muffled with some concern, Rai’s expression was close to being kind. “Just tell me to pull over if you feel like throwing up.”

Rai watched him for a few moments more before turning his attention back to the road, determined to breach a line of minivans.

Okay, Sao whispered to himself, this is ridiculous. Blow out all of that floral air and lightheadedness. Don’t let time pass you by. You sleep past the bad so you can experience the good, or at least live in the innocuous. He fixed his eyes on the road ahead. The way a navel-gazer would find natural - keep your eye on the little things. Watch the tree go by. Count the cars. The exits, the texture of the road…

“Are you sure you’re not gonna vomit?”

“No. Just trying to stay awake.”

“Well, don’t tear any muscles trying.”

“Rai, there’s something I’ve been meaning to ask, though I’ve been putting it off because it may paint my performance… poorly. Why are you so accommodating when it comes to me sleeping during the workday?”

“That’s normal, isn’t it? You’re not a Life Fountain or anything. People need to sleep sometimes.”

“Sometimes. You realize that most offices don’t let employees sleep during the day.”

For reasons his sluggish mind couldn’t figure, Rai was no longer willing to look him in the eye. “I’m not just dense. I’ve worked at other people’s offices and other people have worked in mine. It’s actually kind of flattering that my place can be considered relaxing. And from the little I know of you, I get the feeling you could use the rest; stuff on the mind you wanna sleep off, and all that.”

Sao blinked. “Surely everyone has troubles. That doesn’t mean they’re allowed to shirk.”

“You’ve been shirking?”

Was that rhetorical? Sao mulled this over. True enough that his meagre transcripts were finished on time, or close enough. He admittedly didn’t get many assignments to begin with, but increasing that load had never been a personal goal.

“Whatever.” Rai pulled them into the long stretch of highway that would bring them to Judgment. “As long as you get work done and keep your face on, just do what you have to do. At least you aren’t shitting on me bi-weekly via secret HQ reports. Like some assistants would.”

“Surely that’s an exaggeration.”

Rai bared his teeth. Sao was relieved that the display was aimed at a passing driver. “Remember what you said about taking care of kids? People solve problems in their own ways. If that involves a nap or two, it doesn’t bother me.” 

Not much did, Sao thought, as wind whistled through the gaps in the car’s precarious shell. Despite the natural scowl and perpetually grating tone, Rai was not truly spiteful. It was hard to tell if he was forgiving or simply too busy to bury himself in the trite detail of human relations. Rai’s accommodation for Sao had never been a begrudging bend at the knee for courtesy, nor was it an exceptional show of kindness. It was something that just came naturally.

That was something to admire. Delta had possessed similar qualities as a supervisor. The both slept little and churned out oceans of paperwork in record time. Delta may have had more natural poise and diplomatic skill than Rai, but that made him susceptible to the will of higher-ups. At HQ, there was the Records Department Head. And now - or perhaps all along - there was Sigma.

Sao let his eyes drop to his lap, where his hands were loosely looped around his phone. No response from Delta. But it had only been a few minutes or so. 

Once again, not entirely of his own will, he thought of Wings of Steel. Time had seemed to crawl when he attempted to watch it. Perhaps that was the cure to his loss of time, a vapid film and waiting on text messages. He closed his eyes, purging himself of the vision of Sigma and the latrines.

“Glad you got some rest.”

Sao nearly flew out of his seat, dropping his phone. “What?” 

“What?” Rai asked, in a lopsided echo. “We’re here. I didn’t see anything on the road. Would have been better if you were watching too, but-” 

“I fell asleep?” The dried yellowed blocks of Judgment Street drifted into view.

“I thought so. You had your head down. Are you nauseous?”

“No.”

They drove down the avenue, axles creaking, watching. In Rai’s case, watching Sao.

“I had the strangest thought during that nap.”

“What?”

Sao bit his lip. Despite the assurance, he was not sure how a sleep-related issue could be explained to one that quite literally did not sleep. He mustered a smile. “Rai, what did you really think of Wings of Steel?”

Simultaneously, their phones buzzed.

---

After Charmion informed Rai, and Delta informed Sao, that Sigma had been found, the rickety sedan pressed its way to the outskirts of North Judgment.

Though Sigma was three streets away from Judgment itself, the icing-white triangles of the Northern mansion rooftops were visible over the line of carefully placed trees and fences. Compared to the South side of Judgment, even when seen from this distance, the North Judgment homes were palatial. Sigma eyed the slim, high windows and chimneys wistfully, rotating a single Bell with his fingers under the collar of his black calfskin jacket. He was being led to an ambulance.

The silver car, the same Sigma had driven to Alga, was wrapped around a utility pole. The rounded head had split open like a melon and the entire front windshield was shattered. The deployed airbag sagged through the open gap like flesh, flecked with shards of tinted glass.

“He’s a little shaken up but no major injuries, thank god. We’ll take him to a local station for the night,” explained the officer. “Gotta get a move on. The paparazzi will be here any minute.”

Sigma smiled apologetically, clutching the Bell to his chest like a child with a toy, a lifeline. “Today isn’t my day, it seems.”

“Sigma…” Sao wanted to run up to him, look him over in person. But Sigma was already being laid flat and strapped to a stretcher by one of the ambulance crew.

Rai took over, nudging his way over, calling over the head of the EMTs. “What happened, Sigma? Why are you all the way out here?”

“I just went for a drive. I was hoping to take my mind off… some unpleasant matters from earlier today.”

“We heard you dropped by the Joys’ house.” Rai tilted his head in the direction of Judgment. “You decided today was the day to rekindle old relations?”

“That’s how it was supposed to be. Things started off well enough. But then, I asked…” Sigma’s fingers fumbled, dropping to Bell onto his chest. The instant his fingers lost contact, his face went pale and his voice broke. “Y-you’d best ask the Joys.”

“So you don’t want us to put down your own account of events.”

“Maybe I will, at the station. But I don’t think I’m the most reliable source at the moment. Is Sao... is he doing alright?”

“He’s not feeling great,” Rai said. “Got a little carsick.”

“I see. I’m very sorry, gentlemen.”

“That part’s not your fault.”

Sigma turned to face Rai as best he could with his shoulders belted firmly to the stretcher. “I mean, for everything.”

The ambulance door closed and, trailed by a small police posse, headed for the main road. Rai skulked around Sigma’s crumpled wreck, perhaps mourning the loss of such a beautiful machine, until a tow truck arrived, along with a news van.

“A lotta dirt on the tyres and underside.”

It took a few seconds to click. “You think Sigma drove out to the forest yesterday morning?”

“I guess it’s not especially relevant now.” Rai crawled back into his own car. “Raph’s never going to let anyone hear the end of this.”

“This isn’t exactly a cult leader’s implosion. There was nobody else in the car. He was just distracted, after a day at the therapist, followed by a reunion that had been stressing him for a long time. Accidents happen.”

“Driving into that pole was an accident. But going to his old foster parents’ house wasn’t.”

“Did he say what happened?”

“He said the Joys would give us a better picture.” The engine grumbled to life. “Since we’re nearby, let’s check in.”

---

A bouquet adorning the Joys’ kitchen countertop was a firework array of red lilies and carnations that dazzled like a bonfire against a faded backdrop. In the shade of broad leaves lay several boxes of chocolates. Below that were three laptops still in their packaging, a box containing a rainbow of coloring pencils and markers, and a game system with a box marked ‘premium edition’.

“Sigma brought all this,” Mrs. Joy said. The very sight of the gifts seemed to exhaust her. “And a check, whatever we needed, he said. We declined, sort of thought it was a trick. But then he just wrote down fifty grand. Just to get us started, he said.”

“According to Sigma, he had been planning this a while,” Rai said.

“Is he really okay? I hope they didn’t take our report too far, he didn’t harm anyone, after all...”

“No. He was just taken to the station because of the auto accident.”

“He shouldn't have been here.” Mr. Joy came to rest a hand on his wife’s shoulder. “He just got upset. I don’t understand why. I thought he wanted to get the hell out of here like all the others, why would he come back?”

“Soul-searching. He has a theory that being a good samaritan will help restore the Bell aliens. He was bound to want to repay you for taking care of him, eventually.”

“That’s what he said to us. But…”

Rai folded his arms. “What happened next?

Mrs. Joy wrapped her bony fingers around a mug. “Sigma began asking about picking up some of his old things. Clothes, toys, books… we said there was no guarantee his belongings were still here. Everything in the house was shared, any child who came through after him and left the same way could have picked up any of those items and taken it with them. He said it was fine, but he was quite sure his books were still around. He'd left some things in safe hiding spot, somewhere in the basement, apparently. He got wound up and wanted to go looking for the things himself...”

Sao settled near the doorway, next to the bouquet, hoping the scent of petals might bring him some relief. The house still smelled like urine. From the living room, he heard murmuring, and the babble of television. School was over, the kids were home.

He peered around the corner, and slipped into the hall. The children were sitting in the most beige room he’d ever seen, both in color and decor, from the carpeting to the couch to the walls. There was something of a bouquet on the side table here too, but the difference to Sigma’s lilies was jarring - fake flowers, the leaves aged into a milky grey.

The air stiffened with tension as he entered, though none of the children seemed willing to actually acknowledge his presence. One girl peeked his way, but quickly, almost imperceptibly, shifted her eyes back to the screen before he could catch her gaze.

“Don’t let me bother you,” he said. 

They didn’t. The television was running at such a low volume he could hear every word of the conversation from the kitchen - perhaps that was the point. Sao counted in the audience 12 heads - a full house. What surprised him was that all of the fosters looked to be in their mid-teens, two of the gangly boys were as tall as himself, long legs pulled up on the couch or folded over a cushion on the floor. Somewhat guiltily, his tired brain was struck by the fact it wasn’t just teary-eyed toddlers and naive, innocent babies left on doorsteps who could be orphans. Teenagers and beyond; not only were they neglected by birthright but by storybook impressions of orphans as well. 

All the more gallingly, he had known plenty in his lifetime, and somehow let himself forget. Now he really did feel somewhat nauseated. Memory could make one a monster.

Sao stepped back into the kitchen.

“And he shoved his way to the basement and began tearing at the shelves, pushing aside the boxes and screaming his head off. Where is it, what did you do with it? How could you let this happen? I thought he’d try to take down a wall next, so I started to call the police...”

“And there haven’t been any layout changes to the basement since he left?”

“If you mean renovations, no. We’ve never had the funds. And Sigma talking about books, books, books, picture books, a big hardcover, describing the covers as if we’d ever have been able to afford such things. And we told him if it were some treasure hidden in an old box or corner, well, high chance it was thrown away or another child got to it in the years he’s been gone.” Mrs. Joy noted Sao’s return. “You two can have a look if you want.”

The stairs to the basement were behind the kitchen, where the stench of urine became mixed with damp rot. Sao stalled before the alcove. Even Rai was hesitant. With a pointed look at Sao, he jabbed a finger at a hamper sitting on the landing and pressed it aside with a toe. Stained bedclothes.

There were two more in the basement. Alongside them were stacks of cardboard boxes and storage bags, a few upturned.

“It’s such a shame,” Mrs. Joy said. “Sigma and his friends were some of the best children we’ve had in a while. Best behaved, I mean. He really fixed himself up after Desmond died. But I suppose such things don’t last.”

“Fixed up?” Rai asked, hoarsely. “Sigma was a good kid from the start, wasn’t he?”

“He was harmless, timid. Goodness and manners involve a bit of initiative,” Mr. Joy declared. Rai, losing his patience alongside his oxygen levels, blasted him with a glare, but Joy held his ground. “Of course, I’d never wish the same experiences on anybody, god knows what he saw Desmond do, but Sigma took it in stride, and the incident brought out his better side. Everything seems like a breeze now, he told me, everything’s become tolerable.”

“Tolerable?” Sao wheezed.

“Well, as I said, I don’t fully envy him. It’s likely nothing was ever really easy. The kids on Judgment have to adjust to new homes, new friends, school… Sigma never excelled at schoolwork but the important thing is he got through it. Learned to see the big picture. And the others, at the time, were so impressed. I think they followed his lead.”

“We have to thank Des for that. The poor man,” Mrs. Joy said.

Perhaps it was the crushing lack of ventilation, but her voice seemed more of a squeak.

“Thanks for seeing us again, Mr. Joy. Mrs. Joy.” Rai made his way up the stairs backwards with record-breaking speed. “We’ll be in touch.”